Sunday, May 23, 2010
As I sit here, reflecting on the past five years, there are so many emotions that surface. God has blessed me with a healthy, happy child that brings me so much joy. I am so grateful Zack and I were chosen to be his parents. Not that it is not a huge challenge at times, but it is SO worth it. I am so thankful that I have been blessed with such wonderful friends and family to look to for support and advice along this journey that we call parenthood. It means more to me than you will ever know. I love you all and am so grateful to have friends like you in our lives
I have also had a lot of grief and suffering over the past couple of years also. The loss of my Dad was at times more than I thought I could bear. I miss him so much. Days like today especially. He loved Kohen so, and was a proud "Popsy". I know that he is in a better place, and that he is looking down with that smile only Kohen could bring to his face.
The past six months have been more than difficult. As many of you know about two and a half years ago, a cholesteotoma (benign tumor) was discovered in my ear. I have had extensive surgery that included prosthetic bones and cartilage. When my ear began ringing six months ago, I had no idea what the next few months would entail. After numerous doctors visits, cat scans, medications, injections, I began to lose hope that anything would bring relief from this noise in my head.
I am a positive person. I tried not to let it get the best of me, but some days it did. I had reached the point if I did not see a light at the end of the tunnel, I was going to go over the edge.As I was on the edge of sinking into a deep depression, I went and tried a brand new device to help cope with the noise. That night was my night to keep the nursery at church. I SO wished I could have gone to the service that night. Anyway, I got a text message from my dear friend Melanie about 30 minutes into service. I did not check it until after church......It said which ear bothers you? After church I called her. She said that Pastor Rusty stopped the service and began to talk about someone in the church that was suffering from ringing in their ear. She said he described everything I had been through over the past few months. He prayed for healing and relief. The next day when I woke up, it was like someone had taken the volume switch on the ringing and turned it WAY down. The device now totally blends with the ringing and all I hear is a sound like static on the TV. I am SO thankful! God is so good. I feel like my old self again.
I just want to say thank you to all of you that have been there for me during this difficult time in my life. Honestly, I do not know what I would do without such great friends in my life. You guys lift me up when I am not able to do it myself. Words are not sufficient to express my appreciation. I am beyond blessed to have you in my life.Thanks so much for being there!
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.